Positive Discipline, and Practice

Recently I have been reading and attending classes on a child rearing philosophy known as ‘Positive Discipline.’ Last night it struck me how useful the same concepts could be in the practice of the violin.

The idea is that parents often take one of two tacks with their children. These take the form of being unduly permissive or authoritarian. Often parents oscillate back and forth between the two extremes.

When permissive, the child has no boundaries or guidelines to adhere to, and consequently does not learn self-control. When authoritarian the child is being ruled from an external source, the parent. Self-awareness, and the ability to solve problems for oneself may be missing in the child.

Now, let’s look at the practice of the violin. Briefly, if you are permissive with yourself, you are not fully engaged. As a consequence, your technique will be unreliable, your playing inconsistent, and your music making devoid of substance. We could go on, but that’s enough to get the point.

If you are an authoritarian, on the other hand, you will be tense and fearful, and your music making will come across as forced and unappealing. Perfectionists tend to be authoritarian, from my experience.

Now, let’s look at the middle ground and at the concepts of ‘positive discipline’.

This approach recognizes that guidelines and ‘rules’ are a necessary part of freedom – you need technique to play effortlessly.

At the same time, one must have the patience to feel, to listen to, and to consider your own playing, without self-critical judgment – we are all where we are, and to improve need to think clearly. Authoritarians are often ones who repeat passages over and over without taking time to consider. Recall the ‘knee-jerk repetition’ newsletter.

So, what does it boil down to.

It boils down to being kind and firm with yourself at the same time. It means taking time to really get your mind around what you expect from your hands before you play. It means taking the time to FEEL the results of playing attempts, making adjustments to your thinking and visualizing before replaying. It means seeing mistakes as a necessary part of learning, not as opportunities to condemn yourself.

All the best,

Clayton Haslop

P.S. The Singing Hands Masterclass/Seminar is a wonderful environment in which to grow self-understanding as well as learn the ‘rules’ that enable virtuosic playing. Come reserve your seat at today.